It's Hard To Be Okay

When life is going well it can be harder to accept than when life is going poorly. For many people this seems like it should be counterintuitive but when many of us are being honest with ourselves we see that we don't think we deserve nice things. We don't feel like we should be happy. We don't think that we deserve peace. It is important in those moments to identify the underlying beliefs. For me it often looks like; "I have done so much wrong, how can anything go right for me?" Obviously that means there are things I have yet to forgive myself for. In order to identify those things I have to give myself the time and space to think. Then I have to ask myself:

1. Is there something that is happening now that reminds me of something in my past?
2. Is there anyone who I don't like right now? Why? Do I have anything in common with that person or those people? What is my judgement?
3. Is there anyone who has wronged me other than myself? Can I find it in my heart to forgive them? Can I choose compassion?
4. Is there anything productive I can do right now for myself or for others? Is there anything getting in the way of doing those things?

I then have the choice, after identifying, to forgive and act in such a way as to find resolution. I know that if I choose not to do those things I am choosing to stay sick. I don't help anyone or myself when I do that so I may as well put in the work.